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Trailers before “Deadpool & Wolverine”

Always fascinating to see how many movies I’m never going to watch.

We rarely see R-rated movies, so going to see Deadpool & Wolverine opened up a whole new tranche of trailers, pretty much all of which we won’t be going to.

movie trailer restricted

  • Red One – Doing a Santa Claus action movie, complete with Dwayne Johnson and a very ripped J K Simmons, looks amusing enough that I can see us streaming it some time.
  • Heretic – Hugh Grant as a religious (anti-religious?) fanatic that runs a couple of female door-to-door proselytizers through a horror maze thingamabob … nope. Even though I like Hugh Grant.
  • Wicked – Never saw the stage show (just never worked out), but the trailer looks pretty darned cool. This one we’ll likely see in the theater.
  • Speak No Evil – See, the problem with horror movies is that they say, “Let’s take something that everyone gets paranoid about, like meeting what seems like a nice family while on vacation and accepting their invitation to stay with them at their isolated farmhouse, only to discover that was a Really Bad Idea, and make a movie of it and everyone will want to see it,” whereas I say, no, that’s stuff I am paranoid about and do not need to see that paranoia instantiated in a film.
  • Borderlands – Something video-game based, which looks like kind of CGI action-adventure fun, but my son advises against it, so that’s likely the end of that.
  • Joker 2 – I really don’t need to see a picture that focuses on the Joker. No matter (in fact, probably very matter) how good it is at portraying the homicidal lunatic that’s driven up life insurance rates in Gotham. Let alone seeing another retelling of Harley Quinn’s abusive relationship with same. Nope. I used the time to run off to the restroom before the movie started.
  • A Complete Unknown – This is the year-or-two of Timothée Chalamet, and he looks like he’ll make a great Bob Dylan, and I really have no interest in a Bob Dylan biopic. But at least it’s not Bob Dylan jump-scaring people and then carving them up with a butcher’s knife. Unless there’s more to the story than I know.
  • Captain America: Brave New World – Clearly trying to riff off one of the best Captain America (in fact, MCU) movies, Winter Soldier, with its politics and spy tropes and betrayals, I’m just not convinced yet by the trailers. Oh, don’t get me wrong, I’ll go see it. But I’m not sure what I’ll think of it when I do.
  • Alien: Romulus –  Because the original focused on a bunch of adults, so clearly the only way to milk more money from the Alien franchise is to have it focus on a bunch of teen/twenty-something and What Inevitably Happens When They Try To Steal Stuff From That Mysteriously-Deserted Space Station.  The trailer showed me absolutely nothing I haven’t seen before, so I don’t see much reason (even if I were a fan) to go see it.

Hmmm … so … not a lot of prospect there in movies that thought advertising before Deadpool & Wolverine was a good idea. The only thing I can say is, well, the movie trailers were a hell of a lot more interesting than the more conventional ads that have infested movie trailer time like … well, like face huggers on a mysteriously-deserted space station …

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