Anniversary time!
Thirty years ago today, I married Margie.
Definitely one of, if not the, smartest and most rewarding thing I ever did.
The odds aren’t fantastic that we’ll make it another thirty after this, but however many we roll the odometer to, I’m sure they’ll all be wonderful.
Time passages …
So today is a milestone date for me, which means I’ll probably blabber about it far more than anyone is interested. But, for the record …
Today, 30 years ago, I arrived in Colorado.
I was born and raised a California boy, starting up in the Bay Area, then moving down to LA when I was in early elementary school. Except for a brief 9 month stint up in Fort Collins (Colorado) when I was in high school (as my dad tested out a different twist on his career, which he decided he didn’t care for), I lived, went to college, got jobs, got married, in California.
Fast Forward to 1994, which was not a great year for me — going through a (zany but moderately amicable) divorce, tied up for several months living out of a hotel for a project I was trying to rescue for my employer, and, subsequent to that, sort of kicking around the office, trying to figure out what was next (and learning all about this amazing Internet that the company was finally connected to).
Then my boss asked me if I wanted to move to Denver and become the IT Manager for an office they were expanding there.
All other factors aside, this was nearly a non-starter because (a) I don’t take changes in expected life paths well, and (b) I was very much dating a new girlfriend (and an old friend at that) and didn’t relish the prospect of screwing up a long-distance relationship and losing her.
Sure, I had some indication that I liked Colorado from that brief high school stint. And it was a chance to break out of my funk, not to mention to advance my career. But … still … even after I got over the surprise, there was that relationship thing I did not want to screw up.
I was smart enough not to outright say “No” (or “Yes”), but told my boss I’d sleep on it.
I called the girlfriend, explained my concerns, and she said to take the offer and we’d work it out.
So I did. And then, at a big Thanksgiving Dinner (with my family and hers), I popped the question. Yay, romance. And the next day, we hopped in the car and I moved to Denver. (She only came along for the ride, and headed back home shortly after, juuuuuust before Stapleton was decommissioned).
And I’ve been here ever since, and never looked back. And, if things go as planned, I’ll be here the rest of my life, because I love this town and this state.
Oh, and we did work it out, and got married the following April. (Which means we have another big milestone anniversary next spring. Hmmmm.)
So that was one milestone. Another comes tomorrow. Stay tuned.
For the record …
For the record (and since I’ve been so lax at blogging here this year):
Well, that was sure a year.
COVID-19 dominated our lives in a dozen different ways, as it did everyone else’s. In our case, we went from Empty Nesters to a Fully Full House. First James came home from school for Spring Break … and never went back, as the school went all-remote for the rest of the semester and this fall. And, of course, all those cool summer archaeology programs and internships were canceled, so he did some remote learning classes.
Then, once he was home, Dave’s mom, Gloria’s retirement community went on indefinite lockdown, so we had her move in with us. Dave’s office closed, sending him off to Work from Home. So all four of us got to rattle around together for months until it was safer and easier for Gloria to move back to her place.
On that work front, Dave’s still busy doing chief-of-staff and program management work at [REDACTED], albeit from a laptop and spare monitor on the breakfast room table. He hit two years tenure there this December, and is quite happy about it. Margie continues as the Human Resources Data Governance & Management Lead for [REDACTED], and has been recognized for her achievements by being handed even more big high-visibility projects. She was already full-time Work from Home; the biggest difference for her has been no trips out to the corporate HQ in [REDACTED].
James’ college career at Scripps has been turned into endless Zoom sessions. Fortunately, in our connected world, he’s stayed in touch with his friends. He’s completed the first half of his junior year, and plans a semester abroad in Sweden, focusing on Viking studies. Our cats, Kunoichi and Neko, at least, have enjoyed all the extra company.
Aside from that, things have been quiet. No live theater, no restaurant visits, no vacation travel. We did fly out to Scripps for Parents Day in February, and Margie and James made an isolated drive out there in the summer to donate James’ car (which was just accumulating dust and car insurance bills in a college parking building).
Aside from that it’s been sitting at home, cutting our own hair, ordering delivery from local restaurants to help them stay afloat, having video happy hours with friends and family, and staying safe for ourselves and our loved ones. We miss traveling, having folk over for game parties, and we’ll miss our Twelfth Night party this year, but we’ve been blessed in not having anyone in our immediate circle die or face permanent health damage from COVID-19, and we intend to keep it that way.
So, all in all, not the best of years, but a memorable one — and one we lived through. As always, being together makes both the occasional bumps survivable and the good times even better. So a very Merry Christmas (and other seasonal holidays and celebrations) to you all, and a Happy New Year, too.
Time flies when you’re having fun.
It’s kind of hard to believe it’s been as long as 25 years. It’s gone by so quickly.
It’s kind of hard to believe it’s only been 25 years. It feels like we’ve always been together.
Happy Anniversary, my love.
Twenty-five years ago I popped the question.
It was twenty-five years ago today that I proposed marriage to Margie.
I remain gobsmacked (and deeply grateful) that she said yes.
Twenty-four years, and I find myself enjoying wedded bliss with Margie more each time our anniversary rolls around.
Happy Anniversary, my love.
And, also, yum!
On a cold and blizzardy (let alone bombogenesisial) day, it’s hard to top a big, zesty, savory pot of posole for dinner.
Thanks, Margie!
Apparently lavish Roaring 20s-style weddings inspired by The Great Gatsby are a thing. Even if they are kinda-sorta completely missing the point of Fitzgerald's novel.
Gatsby-Themed Wedding Ideas That Say, ‘I Didn’t Read The Book’
Women’s News. Feminized.
Apparently, in a society that still leans heavily into women taking care of all the household stuff, whether or not they are working a paying job, who does the dishes is a major predictor for marital stress or harmony.
So, I guess, then, that one explanation for my very happy marriage (23 years come this weekend) is that I do the dishes most of the time.
The two important things there being:
a. I do the dishes (because +Margie Kleerup cooks 95% of the meals, so that’s my contribution, and I think I get the much better end of that deal).
b. most of the time (because even though we have patterns of who does what around the house, both of us are willing to pitch in to assist or do the work if circumstances require).
If it avoids relationship tension, I’m happy to do the dishes. Even if I don’t do them as frequently as I ought.
Doing Dishes Is a Major Source of Relationship Tension – The Atlantic
This is now an empirically proven fact. Dishwashing causes more relationship distress than any other household task.
It’s been a… stressful year.
The biggest stress was the whole most-of-the-year-unemployed thing. Which would have sufficed, but there were enough other blood pressure pumped during the year — not even counting US political madness — to challenge my hypertension medication mightily.
On the other had, there was a lot of positive in 2017. Life with my loving wife. A kid who gets niftier with every passing year. Some satisfying writing in November (and elsewhen). One of the most enjoyable RPG campaigns I’ve played in perhaps ever. Teeing things up for a remarkable 2018.
And that year has so many possibilities. A couple of incredible trips. A new chapter with the kid heading to college. My mom moving to Colorado. And, one trusts, a new job.
Past realities. Impending possibilities. With friends and family to make it all worthwhile. I look forward to it.
(Picture from a few weeks ago. :-))
Figuring out what to get Margie is a non-trivial decision, whether it's Valentine's Day, our Anniversary, her Birthday … or Christmas.
[Original: http://xkcd.com/1016/]
Yeah, I admit I am sometimes not very helpful on the subject, +Margie Kleerup.
Originally shared by +Chris Hallbeck:
Choices.
http://maximumble.thebookofbiff.com/2012/12/06/523-shrug/
A fascinating short history of the he's-at-home, the dildos owned by the wives of Nantucket whalers while their husbands were on their multi-year voyages. It's interesting both as a bit of history, but also historicity, as the question of whether such things actually existed mixes into the discussion of privacy, loneliness, and the opacity of the past.
(h/t +Kee Hinckley)
There Once Was a Dildo in Nantucket
The following essay appears in issue 10 of The Common. On Nantucket, 80-year-old Connie Congdon and I sat in her dim living room looking at the 120-year-old plaster dildo that a mason had found in…
Just ask +Margie Kleerup. Especially the last one. Winter is coming …
Originally shared by +Les Jenkins:
This applies to husbands as well. Just ask my wife.
While it's hard to feel too much sympathy for the customers of Ashley Madison being cheated by someone they thought they could trust, it was still a dickish strategy by the site's management (or whatever the fembot equivalent of "dickish" is). I'd be quite happy to see seeing fraud charges filed against the affair site, even if it's based on evidence hacked from their files.
How Ashley Madison Hid Its Fembot Con From Users and Investigators
The developers at Ashley Madison created their first artificial woman sometime in early 2002. Her nickname was Sensuous Kitten, and she is listed as the tenth member of Ashley Madison in the company’s leaked user database. On her profile, she announces: “I’m having trouble with my computer … send a message!”
A young twenty-something couple gets made up to look like they are in their 50s, 70s, and 90s. Which turns out to be more than a bit moving for them.
Originally shared by +Les Jenkins:
Wow. A young couple about to get married in a month agree to be aged via the magic of makeup to see what the might look like in their 50's, 70's, and 90's. The resulting video is surprisingly affecting.
They had a "Snap Yourself" setup at the Wash during the Alumni Weekend Saturday beer fest, complete with hats and a few props. +Margie Kleerup and I went with this combo.
(h/t +Mary Oswell)
Snap Yourself! – Pomona College Alumni Weekend 2015 – 5/2/15 | Facebook
Snap Yourself! posted this photo on 2015-05-02. 0 likes. 2 comments. 0 shares.
