{"id":104,"date":"2003-06-13T09:08:43","date_gmt":"2003-06-13T14:08:43","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/wp\/?p=104"},"modified":"2003-06-13T09:08:43","modified_gmt":"2003-06-13T14:08:43","slug":"domestic_bliss","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/2003\/06\/13\/domestic_bliss.html","title":{"rendered":"Domestic bliss"},"content":{"rendered":"

That’s what Margie and I share, obviously, based on the goings-on at Things My Girlfriend and I Have Argued About<\/a>. A few choice items:<\/p>\n

Margret doesn’t like to watch films on the TV. No, hold on – let me make sure you’ve got the inflection here: Margret doesn’t like to watch <\/i>films on the TV. She says <\/i>she does, but years of bitter experience have proven that what she actually wants is to sit by me while I narrate the entire bleeding film to her<\/i>. ‘Who’s she?’, ‘Why did he get shot?’, ‘I thought that one was on their side?’, ‘Is that a bomb’ – ‘JUST WATCH IT! IN THE NAME OF GOD, JUST WATCH IT!’ The hellish mirror-image of this is when she furnishes me, deaf to my pleading, with her <\/i>commentary. Chair-clawing suspense being assaulted mercilessly from behind by such interjections as, ‘Hey! Look! They’re the cushions we’ve <\/i>got.’, ‘Isn’t she the one who does that tampon advert?’ and, on one famous occasion, ‘Oh, I’ve seen this – he gets killed at the end.’<\/p>\n

See if you can spot the difference between these two statements:
\n(a) “Those trousers<\/i> make your backside look fat.”
\n(b) “You’re a repellently obese old hag upon whom I am compelled to heap insults and derision – depressingly far removed from the, ‘stupid, squeaky, pocket-sized English women,’ who make up my vast catalogue of former lovers and to whom I might as well return right now as I hate everything about you.”
\nMaybe the acoustics were really bad in the dining room, or something.<\/p>\n

She keeps making me carry tampons around – ‘Here, have these, just in case.’
\n‘Oooooooh, why can’t you carry them?’
\n‘I’ve got no pockets.’
\nThen, of course, I forget about them. And the next time I’m meeting The Duchess of Kent or someone I pull a handkerchief out of my pocket and shower feminine hygiene products everywhere.<\/p>\n

Priceless.<\/p>\n

(via Doyce<\/a>)<\/small><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

That’s what Margie and I share, obviously, based on the goings-on at Things My Girlfriend and I Have Argued About. A few choice items: Margret doesn’t like to watch films…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-104","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-personal"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":131319,"url":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/2016\/08\/19\/what-makes-a-mary-jane-watson.html","url_meta":{"origin":104,"position":0},"title":"What makes a Mary Jane Watson?","author":"***Dave","date":"Fri 19-Aug-16 10:45pm","format":false,"excerpt":"MJ is sassy. 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And if they are avoiding stunt cameos \/ Easter Eggs, you run into issues with introducing characters into movies whom most of the moviegoers may never have met before.Going the other direction,\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "~PlusPosts"","block_context":{"text":"~PlusPosts","link":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/category\/blogging\/plusposts"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":129150,"url":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/2015\/12\/16\/the-ultimate-marvel-cinematic-universe-infographic.html","url_meta":{"origin":104,"position":3},"title":"The Ultimate Marvel Cinematic Universe Infographic","author":"***Dave","date":"Wed 16-Dec-15 11:11pm","format":false,"excerpt":"This is a pretty darned amazing unified history of the MCU (though only as accurate as the latest movie and\/or press release). Brilliantly done. 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