{"id":48441,"date":"2014-11-22T11:44:43","date_gmt":"2014-11-22T18:44:43","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/2014\/11\/22\/the-bible-in-ninety-seconds.html"},"modified":"2014-11-23T08:27:12","modified_gmt":"2014-11-23T15:27:12","slug":"the-bible-in-ninety-seconds","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/2014\/11\/22\/the-bible-in-ninety-seconds.html","title":{"rendered":"The Bible in Ninety Seconds"},"content":{"rendered":"

In case one of those Ninety Day Bible-reading programs is too long for you: The Stories of the Bible in TL;DR form:<\/i> http:\/\/www.reddit.com\/r\/Christianity\/comments\/2mpv2r\/the_stories_of_the_bible_in_tldr_form\/<\/a><\/p>\n

GENESIS<\/i><\/b>
God: All right, you two, don't do the one thing. Other than that, have fun.<\/i>
Adam & Eve: Okay.<\/i>
Satan: You should do the thing.<\/i>
Adam & Eve: Okay.<\/i>
God: What happened!?<\/i>
Adam & Eve: We did the thing.<\/i>
God:<\/i> Guys.<\/p>\n

(For those who aren't hep with the crazy slang of the Net young'uns these days, "TL;DR" is short for "Too Long; Didn't Read")<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/a><\/div>\n
\n<\/a>\u00a0\n<\/div>\n

View on Google+<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

In case one of those Ninety Day Bible-reading programs is too long for you: The Stories of the Bible in TL;DR form: http:\/\/www.reddit.com\/r\/Christianity\/comments\/2mpv2r\/the_stories_of_the_bible_in_tldr_form\/ GENESISGod: All right, you two, don't do the one thing. Other than that, have fun.Adam & Eve: Okay.Satan: You should do the thing.Adam & Eve: Okay.God: What happened!?Adam & Eve: We did … Continue reading “The Bible in Ninety Seconds”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":48442,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","_seopress_robots_follow":"","_seopress_robots_imageindex":"","_seopress_robots_snippet":"","_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_robots_breadcrumbs":"","_seopress_robots_freeze_modified_date":"","_seopress_robots_custom_modified_date":"","_seopress_robots_canonical":"","_seopress_social_fb_title":"","_seopress_social_fb_desc":"","_seopress_social_fb_img":"","_seopress_social_fb_img_attachment_id":0,"_seopress_social_fb_img_width":0,"_seopress_social_fb_img_height":0,"_seopress_social_twitter_title":"","_seopress_social_twitter_desc":"","_seopress_social_twitter_img":"","_seopress_social_twitter_img_attachment_id":0,"_seopress_social_twitter_img_width":0,"_seopress_social_twitter_img_height":0,"_seopress_redirections_value":"","_seopress_redirections_enabled":"","_seopress_redirections_enabled_regex":"","_seopress_redirections_logged_status":"","_seopress_redirections_param":"","_seopress_redirections_type":0,"_seopress_analysis_target_kw":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[106,27],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-48441","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-plusposts","category-religion"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/11\/Michaelangelo+Creation+of+Sun+and+Earth.jpgimgmax=660.jpg","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":9167,"url":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/2006\/02\/03\/not_a_real_doct.html","url_meta":{"origin":48441,"position":0},"title":"Not a real Doctor","author":"***Dave","date":"Fri 3-Feb-06 9:59am","format":false,"excerpt":"Dr. Pepper and it's ninety-odd imitators, many of which claim to be Doctors, some of which are only Misters, but almost all of which come in the familiar dark red...","rel":"","context":"In "Food & Drink"","block_context":{"text":"Food & Drink","link":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/category\/food-drink"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":133558,"url":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/2017\/05\/28\/i-became-something-else-for-charity.html","url_meta":{"origin":48441,"position":1},"title":"I became … something else (for charity)","author":"***Dave","date":"Sun 28-May-17 12:33am","format":false,"excerpt":"Stephen Amell doing the \"American Ninja Warrior\" course for charity. Like Arrow or hate it (TL;DR: yes), I have to give the man props for being able to do this kind of thing. Watch Arrow\u2018s Stephen Amell Tear Through the American Ninja Warrior Course View on Google+","rel":"","context":"In "~PlusPosts"","block_context":{"text":"~PlusPosts","link":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/category\/blogging\/plusposts"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":130582,"url":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/2016\/05\/03\/the-banana-republic-presidential-candidate.html","url_meta":{"origin":48441,"position":2},"title":"The Banana Republic Presidential Candidate","author":"***Dave","date":"Tue 3-May-16 11:40pm","format":false,"excerpt":"On some Latin American lessons about those who run too vigorously as \"outsider\" candidates. (TL;DR: It generally doesn't end well. Either they don't understand institutional processes, and therefore fail as impotent, or else they fight institutional processes, and therefore leave the country weaker.) Beware the Outsider I'm afraid of Donald\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "~PlusPosts"","block_context":{"text":"~PlusPosts","link":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/category\/blogging\/plusposts"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":129637,"url":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/2016\/02\/02\/how-to-order-drinks.html","url_meta":{"origin":48441,"position":3},"title":"How to order drinks","author":"***Dave","date":"Tue 2-Feb-16 9:55pm","format":false,"excerpt":"TL;DR:1. Don't hold up the line of other people ordering.1a. Figure out in advance what your go-to bar drink is and, unless solicited to think of something new and exciting, order it.2. Be nice to your bar tender and wait staff.Um ... yeah, that pretty much makes perfect sense. See,\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "~PlusPosts"","block_context":{"text":"~PlusPosts","link":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/category\/blogging\/plusposts"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":154652,"url":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/2021\/07\/20\/tv-review-invincible-season-1-2021.html","url_meta":{"origin":48441,"position":4},"title":"TV Review: Invincible, Season 1 (2021)","author":"***Dave","date":"Tue 20-Jul-21 11:06pm","format":false,"excerpt":"This bloody take on four-color teen heroes is even better, and bloodier, on-screen.","rel":"","context":"In "Animation \/ Cartoons"","block_context":{"text":"Animation \/ Cartoons","link":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/category\/media\/media-cartoons"},"img":{"alt_text":"Invincible","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/Invincible.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/Invincible.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/Invincible.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/Invincible.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/Invincible.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/Invincible.jpg?resize=1400%2C800&ssl=1 4x"},"classes":[]},{"id":42533,"url":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/2014\/06\/12\/more-media-merger-mania.html","url_meta":{"origin":48441,"position":5},"title":"More Media Merger Mania","author":"***Dave","date":"Thu 12-Jun-14 2:04pm","format":false,"excerpt":"TL;DR Summary: \"You have to let us merge into a much bigger company because Comcast is a much bigger company so we can't compete against them.\"Because, of course, the bigger the FTC and FCC let media companies get, the more they'll be able to compete so that they can serve\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "~PlusPosts"","block_context":{"text":"~PlusPosts","link":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/category\/blogging\/plusposts"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/48441","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=48441"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/48441\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":48487,"href":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/48441\/revisions\/48487"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/48442"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=48441"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=48441"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hill-kleerup.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=48441"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}