So she can have his baby.<\/a><\/p>\n“When the doctor said my husband was not going to make it, I felt like I couldn’t go on without him,” said Mandy Garvin, 22, who was married to Josh Garvin for about a year. “He wanted to be a daddy. He wanted to have a little boy so he could spoil that boy so much.”<\/p>\n
I’m sorry for your grief, lady. Really. It’s a tragedy. But he’s never going to be a daddy. He’s dead now. He’s not going to be able to spoil a little boy (presuming that’s how that <\/i>crap shoot works out). He’ll never be able to spoil his child.<\/p>\n
He’s dead.<\/p>\n
Is it worth it as a tribute to your dead husband to go out of your way to have a child without a father? Is this about the child? About your husband? Or about your grief, your loss of your husband, your loss of the idealized expectations you had of your future life together?<\/p>\n
On Tuesday, doctors at Swedish told Mandy they’d found a cryogenics lab in California that would accept the sperm. The news ended a tense two days, in which Mandy Garvin and her family not only lost Josh but also almost lost the hope of seeing his eyes again in a newborn baby.
\n“It was really tough, going through losing my son-in-law and then the chance of Mandy not having a light at the end of the tunnel,” said Mandy’s father, Mike Elliott.<\/p>\n
Has anyone gotten this woman — and, for that matter, her family — some grief counselling? Would some family friend please <\/i>tell them this is not <\/i>the time to be making life-altering decisions?<\/p>\n
It won’t be Josh’s eyes, folks. It won’t be Josh. Get a grip, people? Grieve, but don’t drag an innocent into your grieving process as well.<\/i><\/p>\n
“She and Josh just really wanted to have a baby and share that love,” Elliott said. “I was just waiting to be a grandfather, and it would have been just such a special time in our lives.”<\/p>\n
And it’s a terrible tragedy that it won’t happen now. Even if Mandy has a baby, it won’t be the same as Mandy and Josh having the baby. Really. And the baby involved is going to suffer for it.<\/p>\n
I can’t believe, to be quite honest, that the story was presented in such wistfully romantic tones(“Dreams of Fatherhood Stay Alive” reads the headline), with nary a criticism of the whole idea quoted from anyone, nor any consideration of the problems discussed. <\/p>\n
It is, ultimately, up to Mandy what to do. I just hope she waits several months — or more — before making that decision. Because, as it stands, she’s doing it for all the wrong reasons.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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