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Enough already!

I have not seen Return of the King yet. I am not likely to see RotK until sometime this weekend. I don’t want to hear about it. I don’t want…

I have not seen Return of the King yet.

I am not likely to see RotK until sometime this weekend.

I don’t want to hear about it. I don’t want to read about it. I don’t want to hear or read how RotK fever is sweeping the globe, and even normally staid institutions and snooty film critics are calling it the film of the year, validating every geeky fanboy who ever wrote his name out in Tengwar.

So shut up, okay? Just shut up!

Thank you. I feel better.

24 view(s)  

12 thoughts on “Enough already!”

  1. Don’t want to hear all the good stuff about it? okay, here are three negative reviews written by morons:

    http://www.rottentomatoes.com/click/movie-1127213/reviews.php?critic=columns&sortby=default&page=1&rid=1230464
    He actually whines about htere being no “last time on middle earth….” at the beginning

    http://www.rottentomatoes.com/click/movie-1127213/reviews.php?critic=columns&sortby=default&page=15&rid=1230628
    this person is just unintelligent

    http://www.rottentomatoes.com/click/movie-1127213/reviews.php?critic=columns&sortby=default&page=11&rid=1230469
    And this person doesn’t realize that it was BASED ON A BOOK!

    -Speaker

  2. Well, just looking at the first one:

    … dude doesn’t realize LotR was originally written as a single volume, and divided into three by the publisher, not Tolkien.

    … dude doesn’t realize the Normans were initially blonde-haired and blue-eyed, too, being basically Norse invaders of France, etc.

    Neither of which says anything about dude’s talent as a film critic, but much about dude’s ignorance of history used to back up dude’s point.

    The second review you quote is mostly “This is what I like, this is what I hate” sort of stuff. Hard to argue with, but easy to disagree with.

    Yes, the third reviewer seems to have no idea that these were books, let alone the contents thereof. Of course, in adopting books, one takes on responsibilities to make them work on-screen, with appropriate explanation and plotting and pacing. Jackson is certainly not without sin in some of these areas at times.

    The biggest obstacle LotR has faced is trying to put umpteen hundred pages into even 9 hours of screen time — and umpteen hundred pages rich in backstory (several dozen umpteen hundred pages more). Jackson has filled in about as much detail as possible, left little out (though what he has, even in the Extended editions, the truefans have lamented bitterly). That he’s managed to hold the mythology together so well, even within the, say, 12-plus hours of movietelling the extended editions will encompass — is the true triumph of this effort.

    And I have no idea where I was going with that line of thought. Oh, well.

  3. Well, for the last two years, Margie and I have never been able to see it when it comes out because things have been just too hectic-busy. So we go to California, then on Saturday or Sunday hit an afternoon matinee and enjoy a romantic 3+ hours together.

    Looks like we’ll do that this year, too.

    Appallingly, I’m not sure what we’ll do next year.

  4. It’s okay, it happens to the best of us 😉
    I’ve just seen all the documentaries on JRRT and my friend, is like an EXPERT….so I’ve had all that grounded in.
    I thought maybe the one volume idea was an urban legend, but it’s not on Snopes….weird . . .
    -Speaker

  5. If you don’t want to hear about RotK, Dave, stop reading now, because I can’t keep quiet until you finally get around to seeing it, okay?

    Best of the three! Wahooooo!

    Favorite scene: death of the Witch-king of Angmar!

    Runners-up: Mûmakil! Eagles!

    Biggest disappointment: no ents!

    Much less screen time for Arwen, and what little there is works pretty well.

    Listen for Wilhelm again!

    Okay, that’s enough for now.

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