Doctor in the house

Here’s a witty little piece from the Daily Standard on the health aspects of being a porn star.

Of course, my favorite part was this particularly fun turn of phrase:

I’ve never had much enthusiasm for pornography. Watching people have congress is a bit like watching people eat , in that eating is both necessary and satisfying, but when watching someone else do it, you just want to tell them to chew with their mouth closed.

Not that I necessarily agree with the sentiment, but it’s nicely put.

The article is full of advice from the Adult Industry Medical Health Care Foundation (AIM) in beautiful Sherman Oaks, California (“Home of More Tacky Living Rooms You’ve Seen in Skin Flicks than Any Other Suburb in America!”).

There is, of course, lots of elbow-ribbing double entendres and explicit sex-talk–porners by nature, work blue. But there are also lots of real-world helpful hints–if your real world consists of a drafty warehouse in the San Fernando Valley where creepy cameramen film you performing unnatural acts. As Hartley and Sharon Mitchell hold forth from director’s chairs under a quaint back-yard gazebo, the most important thing for aspiring porners to remember , they say, is safety first. While AIDS has largely been curtailed in current porn circles with regular HIV-testing, other sexually transmitted diseases have run rampant. “We know that hepatitis and chlamydia stick around for a while,” says Mitchell, “so clean your [sex] toys thoroughly, sometimes soap and water will not do.” AIM, conveniently, provides toy cleaner. But, cautions Hartley, “Do not mistake toy-cleaner for lube.”

Words to (perhaps literally) live by.