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“No, I am … crazy, and I need a menthol cigarette.”

A Pennsylvania school teacher does drugs, strips naked, and stands outside in the snow until officers come. Upon being queried if he was okay (one of those great conversational gambits…

A Pennsylvania school teacher does drugs, strips naked, and stands outside in the snow until officers come. Upon being queried if he was okay (one of those great conversational gambits that cops learn to use), he replied as above.

When asked where he lived and why he was naked, Lofton is alleged to have said that he was “Jesus Christ” and that the officer must be “God,” court papers say.

A scuffle broke out between the two men during which Lofton is alleged to have hit the officer over the head with a long plastic toy trumpet which he scooped up from nearby.

The officer used his pepper spray on Lofton, at first to no avail. Then a cursing Lofton advised the officer that “‘Jesus’ is now blind,” court papers say.

I’m sure it’s sad, in many ways, but — well, that line must made me crack up. That deserves to be a t-shirt or something.

(via Romenesko)

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