A palliative caregiver summarizes what she most heard from her dying patients about things they regretted most as their lives drew to a close.
1. I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
2. I wish I didn't work so hard.
3. I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.
A lot of these feel like external restraints or compulsions that were internalized, but never enough to be happy about. Gives one pause for thought. #ddtb
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Top Five Regrets Of The Dying
For many years I worked in palliative care. My patients were those who had gone home to die. Some incredibly special times were shared. I was with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their live…
I suspect that people are unlikely to tell the whole truth about what they regret, even if they are about to die.
Well, last statements are usually lent extra weight in court, but I suspect that, yes, even on one's deathbed there may be things one wouldn't talk about ("she took it to her grave with her" also being a truism).
I think my father in law, Irby, had none of those regrets. One of the few who could say that–save that being dead, they usually can’t.
The work that he did, running a charter fishing boat in the Gulf of Mexico, was always a source of joy to him–except when dealing with idiotic/Catch-22 regs of the Coast Guard regarding boats.
He managed to live a pretty happy life.