“Hi. My name is Dave. And I watch Smallville.”
Hi, Dave!
When Smallville first started I had — well, less-than-zero interest in it. “Look — it’s Smallville Creek,” I’d josh, and though I’d occasionally tune it in if I was on a business trip and in the hotel and it was the right day and I wasn’t doing something else … nothing I saw made me feel any different. Cheesy effects, Young Super-Hero Teen Angst, and … well … meh.
I decided, when the big “Justice Society of America” episode came up this season to give it another look-see, if only to see how godawful it was. I am a JSA fan, after all. And …
Well …
Okay, it’s like candy corn. It’s sweet. It’s cheap. It’s mildly nauseating in excess. It’s not what you’d want to have every night.
But it’s not that bad. The FX are still pretty crappy — amazing what you can do with blur-o-shaky-cam-vision — and the story is still soap-operatic. But it’s at least in Metropolis now, and there are enough parallels to the canonical comics (to the extent that applies any more) that I just sort of enjoy, candy corn-like, seeing how they play with the plot elements. Zod, Amanda Waller, Green Arrow, the JSA, Martian Manhunter, Kandor and the lost Kryptonians, Silver-freakin-Banshee, Metallo-fer-goshsakes …
The whole “he’s not Superman, he’s ‘The Blur'” and coy Matrixy non-uniform thing is simultaneously goofy and interesting. The questions of trust and family and who’s preparing to counter whom, and who’s in the right (or wrong) about it is a bit intriguing. There’s some writing there that’s no worse than what the average issue of Action has (even if it’s not as sophisticated or interesting or enjoyable as, say, Superman: TAS, or the animated Justice League). There’s far more insulting drama on TV, in short. Which is definitely damning with faint praise, but I’ll leave it at that.
I don’t know if I’ll finally watch one episode too many and swear off the candy corn series for another year, or if I’ll continue just munching a bit from week to week. If I had to cancel my cable, it would be the least of shows I watch that I’d mourn.
But I’m still enjoying it. As a guilty not-so-anymore-secret.
I also watched the JSA episode. I would not have believed it possible, but it’s true: I lost respect for Geoff Johns.
I had no idea Johns could right such cheesy dialogue. Or scenes with no point except to give screen time to Lois Lane. Or try to make us believe that JSA members could be killed in a few seconds by a gut who makes ice.
Of course, it wasn’t all his fault. There’s the guy who’s trying to play Green Arrow with a Batman voice. Or the fact that Green Arrow and all these other heroes are established long before Superman. Or this “meteorite” that gives humans super powers.
Too bad a Crisis didn’t wipe out this Earth.
Okay, before you can come anywhere near Smallville, you have to accept it’s a different universe. Think of it like a Legion of Super-Heroes reboot (plenty of practice here) — try to find a way to appreciate taking the puzzle, throwing it up in the air, getting rid of half the pieces, adding in a few new ones, and then seeing how they make it fit together.
The dialog is, perforce, cheesy. Writing superhero dialog generally is.
I have to admit to occassionally watching Smallville. OK, I watched most of the first season, and then off and on since then, but I haven’t seen any episodes from this season.
The first introduction of Green Arrow, was relatively cool. But, yeah, he’s a bit too angsty.
The metoerites are Kryptonite, and are well established in Smallville canon as powering up normals who get exposed to them. The writers apparently needed deus ex machina to threaten Clark.
This is where I also have to admit to having enjoyed “Birds of Prey.”
I did watch Birds of Prey. Somebody please tell me why Black Canary was changed to a psychic teen!
Why did I watch? Simple. Dina Meyer as Oracle. Wonderful casting, and the only really good thing about the show.
I watched, like, one episode. That’s all I could stand, I can’t stands no more.