Superiority complex

I’m not a regular reader of Dear Abby, but Anne’s commentary on this particular bit inspired me. (BTW, Anne, your template is working solidly but your comment code is frelled.)

In it, a Hindu woman living in the Bible belt complains that her kindly Christian neighbors are slipping in little prosetylization pamphlets along with the Christmas cookies they give her. She feels irked and annoyed, and rightfully so. Christmas gifts are not the time to try to bring someone to Jesus, if you so feel compelled to do so; adding not-so-subtle messages to that effect only makes people suspicious of your hospitality, and less likely to have anything to do with you.

If you want to try and convert someone, have the balls to do so openly, if kindly and politely. “Susan, listen, we’re good friends and neighbors, and as such I really want to tell you a little bit about Jesus in my life.” And if Susan, also responding kindly and politely, makes it clear that she really doesn’t need or want to hear about it, then leave it be; if the Spirit moves her in the future, she’ll know who to turn to, and pushing it will just further alienate her.

The only other comment I have is on this. “Happy Hindu” writes Abby,

To try to convert someone to your faith implies that you consider your religious beliefs superior, and that is just plain wrong.

I’m not sure I can agree with that. Some beliefs are “superior” to others. I would say a belief in liberty is better than a belief in slavery, and for me to hold that evaluation is not “just plain wrong.”

Similarly, I think my religious beliefs bear a shade more resemblance to reality than those of some other folks. Perhaps I am different from most in recognizing that my beliefs are certainly far short from being reality. But if I didn’t think my religious beliefs were “superior” to others, I wouldn’t have any cause to squawk when my neighbor wanted to offer his kids up in sacrifice to Baal or something.

Now, there are belief systems that hold that there are many paths to the Truth. For many more conservative Christians, Christianity is not one of those tolerant belief systems; it is, instead, the Revealed Word of God, and therefore is superior to superstitious twaddle like Hinduism and the like.

To simply assert that belief is “just plain wrong” is to be as intolerant as those kindly Christian neighbors who think the same thing about Hinduism.

H.L. Mencken said,

We must respect the other fellow’s religion, but only in the sense and to the extent that we respect his theory that his wife is beautiful and his children are smart.

Such things are axiomatic to an individual, unless outside events conspire to prove otherwise — and, even then, it will take someone a long time to be convinced. You can’t argue axioms.

But! cry the Christian conservatives. But! But isn’t being saved from eternal damnation a small price to pay for possibly being offended at first?

Maybe, if you believe in eternal damnation. But that assumes that burying someone in a blizzard of pamphlets, or constantly noodging them to get smart and come to Sunday service, is going to actually get them to want to be saved. If you went up to a man and said, “You know, that wife you love and think is beautiful, she’s really just an old hag — come with me and meet a woman who’s really gorgeous,” he’d probably poke you in the snoot. Or get you arrested for procurement.

But are we not commanded, in the Great Commission, to spread the Good News?

You are, indeed, which is why non-Christians should probably cut you at least a bit of slack when it comes to this. You’re only following orders, after all, being nudged by your metaphysical Parent up to the front door to sell cookies.

Still, there’s spreading and then there’s spreading. Think of advertising. Aren’t there commercials you consider offensive, insulting, so awful that they actually not only make you not want to buy the product, but make you go out of your way to avoid it? Trying to force your religion on someone else is just like that. And that’s a crying shame, because it’s not necessary. There are ways of letting someone know that you’re Christian without slapping a “I’m Saved, You’re Not” bumper sticker on your car. There are ways of making Christianity sound attractive other than screaming about how awful other religions are. And there are ways of inviting people to at least give your Good News a try other than being a nag about it.

Nobody likes a nag. Even if they’re right. Sometimes, especially if they’re right.

Don’t let the message get blurred by the messenger. Something for folks on both side of this to remember.