(Like most such lists, about 80% accurate and about 70% funny, but …)
- You switch from “Heat” to “A/C” in one day.
- You know what the “Peoples Republic of Boulder” means.
- Your sense of direction is: towards the mountains and away from the mountains.
- You’re a meat-eating vegetarian.
- The bike on your car is worth more than your car.
- You use a down comforter in the summer because you have the a/c on at 55 degrees.
- You’re able to drive 65 miles per hour through 13 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without even flinching.
- You take your out-of-town guests to Casa Bonita even though you would never go there otherwise.
- You install security lights on your house and garage but leave all the doors unlocked.
- You think the major food groups are granola bars, tofu and Fat Tire Beer.
- You carry jumper cables in the car and your girlfriend knows how to use them.
- You design your kid’s Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
- Driving is better in the winter ’cause the pot holes are filled with snow.
- You know all 4 seasons “almost winter, winter, still winter and “construction”.
- You’ve been tear gassed in a riot to celebrate a team’s victory.
- You can never figure out why your out-of-town guests faint from altitude sickness on a picnic to the mountains.
- You can drive over a 12,000 foot pass in 4 feet of snow, but can’t get to work if there are 4 inches of snow.
- You know the ‘correct’ pronunciation of Buena Vista.
- When you visit friends at sea level, you can drink a case of beer and not get a buzz.
- Your car insurance costs more than your car.
- You have surge protectors on every outlet.
- April showers bring May blizzards.
- You see someone riding a Harley in a downpour, and you look closer to see if it’s anyone you know.
- ‘Timberline’ is someplace you have actually been. Many times.
- You know what a ‘Chinook’ is.
- You know what a ‘Rocky Mountain oyster’ is.
- You know what a ‘fourteener’ is.
- But you don’t know what a ‘turn signal’ is.
- A bear on your front porch doesn’t bother you nearly as much as a Democrat in Congress does.
- Your golf bag has a 9-iron, a 3-wood and a lightning-rod.
- You know who Alfred Packer was.
- You know who Baby Doe Tabor was.
- You know who Jim Beckworth was.
- You’d be happier if you didn’t know who Barbra Streisand was.
- SPF 90 is not out of the question.
- People from other states breathe 5 times as often as you do.
- Having a Senator named Nighthorse doesn’t seem strange.
- Thunder has set off your car alarm! .
- You have an $800 stereo in a $300 truck.
- A sudden loss of cabin pressure is not a big deal.
- You think a red light means 3 more cars can go.
- “Where we’re going, we don’t need roads!!”
- You know where Doc Holliday’s grave is.
- You know where Buffalo Bill’s grave is.
- You know where the real ‘South Park’ is.
- You can recognize the license plates of all 50 states on sight.
- Driving directions usually include ‘Go over_____ Pass…’
- You’ve dressed in shorts, sandals, and a parka.
- You’ve gone skiing in July.
- You’ve gone sunbathing in January.
- You get a certain feeling of satisfaction from knowing that California and Texas are both downstream.
And most important:
- You actually understand these jokes and send them to your friends!
(via a co-worker)
1,2,3,7,18,19,21,24,25,26,27,31,32,33,35,36,37,38,40,43,44,45,46,47,48,49,50,51!
We (in Charlotte) have gone through #1 (and it’s reverse) a few times in the last couple weeks. Generally it happens only for a limited time – like a couple of weeks in the fall – but it does happen!
Perhaps needless to say, but #28 and #41 are also present here in significant quantities. Though I must say that I am beginning to believe that they appear almost as universally as hydrogen, so that is probably not a surprise.
1*,2,3,11,12*,16,17,21,22,24,25,26,27,32,35,36,37,43,44,45,48*,51,52
Actually, 14 is probably the most seriously false one here — except for “Construction” season.
* With particular atttention.