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You know you’re from Colorado if …

(Like most such lists, about 80% accurate and about 70% funny, but …) You switch from “Heat” to “A/C” in one day. You know what the “Peoples Republic of Boulder”…

(Like most such lists, about 80% accurate and about 70% funny, but …)

  1. You switch from “Heat” to “A/C” in one day.
  2. You know what the “Peoples Republic of Boulder” means.
  3. Your sense of direction is: towards the mountains and away from the mountains.
  4. You’re a meat-eating vegetarian.
  5. The bike on your car is worth more than your car.
  6. You use a down comforter in the summer because you have the a/c on at 55 degrees.
  7. You’re able to drive 65 miles per hour through 13 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without even flinching.
  8. You take your out-of-town guests to Casa Bonita even though you would never go there otherwise.
  9. You install security lights on your house and garage but leave all the doors unlocked.
  10. You think the major food groups are granola bars, tofu and Fat Tire Beer.
  11. You carry jumper cables in the car and your girlfriend knows how to use them.
  12. You design your kid’s Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
  13. Driving is better in the winter ’cause the pot holes are filled with snow.
  14. You know all 4 seasons “almost winter, winter, still winter and “construction”.
  15. You’ve been tear gassed in a riot to celebrate a team’s victory.
  16. You can never figure out why your out-of-town guests faint from altitude sickness on a picnic to the mountains.
  17. You can drive over a 12,000 foot pass in 4 feet of snow, but can’t get to work if there are 4 inches of snow.
  18. You know the ‘correct’ pronunciation of Buena Vista.
  19. When you visit friends at sea level, you can drink a case of beer and not get a buzz.
  20. Your car insurance costs more than your car.
  21. You have surge protectors on every outlet.
  22. April showers bring May blizzards.
  23. You see someone riding a Harley in a downpour, and you look closer to see if it’s anyone you know.
  24. ‘Timberline’ is someplace you have actually been. Many times.
  25. You know what a ‘Chinook’ is.
  26. You know what a ‘Rocky Mountain oyster’ is.
  27. You know what a ‘fourteener’ is.
  28. But you don’t know what a ‘turn signal’ is.
  29. A bear on your front porch doesn’t bother you nearly as much as a Democrat in Congress does.
  30. Your golf bag has a 9-iron, a 3-wood and a lightning-rod.
  31. You know who Alfred Packer was.
  32. You know who Baby Doe Tabor was.
  33. You know who Jim Beckworth was.
  34. You’d be happier if you didn’t know who Barbra Streisand was.
  35. SPF 90 is not out of the question.
  36. People from other states breathe 5 times as often as you do.
  37. Having a Senator named Nighthorse doesn’t seem strange.
  38. Thunder has set off your car alarm! .
  39. You have an $800 stereo in a $300 truck.
  40. A sudden loss of cabin pressure is not a big deal.
  41. You think a red light means 3 more cars can go.
  42. “Where we’re going, we don’t need roads!!”
  43. You know where Doc Holliday’s grave is.
  44. You know where Buffalo Bill’s grave is.
  45. You know where the real ‘South Park’ is.
  46. You can recognize the license plates of all 50 states on sight.
  47. Driving directions usually include ‘Go over_____ Pass…’
  48. You’ve dressed in shorts, sandals, and a parka.
  49. You’ve gone skiing in July.
  50. You’ve gone sunbathing in January.
  51. You get a certain feeling of satisfaction from knowing that California and Texas are both downstream.

    And most important:

  52. You actually understand these jokes and send them to your friends!

(via a co-worker)

70 view(s)  

3 thoughts on “You know you’re from Colorado if …”

  1. We (in Charlotte) have gone through #1 (and it’s reverse) a few times in the last couple weeks. Generally it happens only for a limited time – like a couple of weeks in the fall – but it does happen!

    Perhaps needless to say, but #28 and #41 are also present here in significant quantities. Though I must say that I am beginning to believe that they appear almost as universally as hydrogen, so that is probably not a surprise.

  2. 1*,2,3,11,12*,16,17,21,22,24,25,26,27,32,35,36,37,43,44,45,48*,51,52

    Actually, 14 is probably the most seriously false one here — except for “Construction” season.

    * With particular atttention.

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