Golf 2 | ***Dave Does the Blog

Golf marshals aren’t usually armed …

While there are times when one gets more than a little irked at the foursome ahead dawdling their way through the course, I suspect that this behavior is not according…

While there are times when one gets more than a little irked at the foursome ahead dawdling their way through the course, I suspect that this behavior is not according to PGA rules …

An Orange County sheriff’s reserve deputy was ordered to trial for allegedly pulling a gun on two slow-playing golfers and threatening them at Los Serranos Golf & Country Club. Witnesses said Raymond Yi, 44, pointed a gun at the golfers and flashed his sheriff’s badge during the July incident.

In fact, considering my own frame of mind when golfing, I’d suggest that carrying a gun on a golf course is a bad idea for all sorts of reasons …

Words on golf

From my folks … I have just finished my new book on golf that I believe gives the reader valuable playing tips and insider information that I have gained through…

From my folks …

I have just finished my new book on golf that I believe gives the reader valuable playing tips and insider information that I have gained
through 50 years of experience. The cost is only $29.95. Cash only please

The following is the chapter listing to give you an overview. Don’t wait until they’re all gone!

Table of Contents:

Chapter 1 – How to Properly Line Up Your Fourth Putt

Chapter 2 – How to Hit a Nike from the Rough When You Hit a Titleist from the Tee

Chapter 3 – How to Avoid the Water When You Lie 8 in a Bunker

Chapter 4 – How to Get More Distance Off the Shank

Chapter 5 – When to Give the Ranger the Finger

Chapter 6 – Using Your Shadow on the Greens to Maximize Earnings

Chapter 7 – When to Implement Handicap Management

Chapter 8 – Proper Excuses for Drinking Beer Before 9 a.m.

Chapter 9 – How to Rationalize a 6 Hour Round

Chapter 10 – How to Find That Ball That Everyone Else Saw Go in the Water

Chapter 11 – Why Your Spouse Doesn’t Care That You Birdied the 5th

Chapter 12 – How to Let a Foursome Play Through Your Twosome

Chapter 13 – How to Relax When You Are Hitting Three Off the Tee

Chapter 14 – When to Suggest Major Swing Corrections to Your Opponent

Chapter 15 – God and the Meaning of the Birdie-to-Bogey Three Putt

Chapter 16 – When to Regrip Your Ball Retriever

Chapter 17 – Can You Purchase a Better Golf Game?

Chapter 18 – Why Male Golfers Will Pay $5.00 a Beer From The Cart Girl and Give Her a $3 Tip, But Will Balk at $3.50 at the 19th Hole and Stiff the Bartender

I think I could use several of those …

Weekend update

Well, my folks were out, for the main thing — arriving mid-day Thursday, leaving early Tuesday morning. No CoH, but plenty of other fun-filled activities: Friday While Kitten was in…

Well, my folks were out, for the main thing — arriving mid-day Thursday, leaving early Tuesday morning. No CoH, but plenty of other fun-filled activities:

Friday
While Kitten was in school, the folks and Margie and I did 9 holes on the executive Par 3 at South Suburban. Well, that was the plan. Margie got stuck doing Work work, and missed out. I played pretty respectably (a 41 on the Par 27), and netted many more balls from the partially-full water hazards than I lost.

Saturday
Big fun in the morning was going swimming. Kitten was in hog heaven, and everyone had a good time.

In the afternoon/evening, we hosted the Testerclan over — Jackie, Justin, Kaylee, Doyce’s mom, Doyce’s sister, and Doyce’s niece and nephew. Randy and Stan were there, too. Doyce evidently made the mistake of lying down for a nap and never quite making it back up again. Burrito bar in the kitchen and a good time had by all.

Sunday
After church, headed up to Rocky Mountain National Park and Trail Ridge Road. Much alpine scenic beauty, with occasional glimpses of elk and moose. A long trip, but a lot of fun.

On the way home, we pinged Stan for suggestions of somewhere in Boulder to eat. He suggested Sunflower, but we decided it was a bit too … organic for us. We ended up at Trattoria on Pearl, which was duly nummy.

Katherine crashed on the way home, and after I got her upstairs to bed and to sleep, I quickly followed. It was a long drive and a long day.

Monday
Dad and I played golf at Littleton (formerly Centennial, renamed since it’s not in the city of Centennial as subsequently constituted) with Doyce. Nine holes, par 31 — and not so good results. I ended up with a 52, despite a par and a couple of bodies, largely due to a couple of really godawful holes. Driving was actually remarkably good, as was some of the chipping and pitching, but the middle game and the putting was nothing to write home about.

So need to play more …

In the afternoon, I took the ‘rents to Best Buy to discuss digital cameras. I think the plan they ended up with was to get a digital with a decent zoom on it (like my recently-purchased-and-currently-in-Africa-with-the-in-laws Panasonic Lumix DMC-FZ20S.

After that, Margie (who’d been slaving away on actual Work work) joined us for a game of miniature golf — which she proceeded to win at, huzzah. Kitten had a pretty good time, too.

Head home, have a nice steak dinner, watch some Nero Wolfe, and call it a night.

So, overall, a fun weekend, albeit a bit exhausting — despite being able to sleep in, I feel like I’ve been running at high speed the whole time. Back to a fairly normal schedule this week — except for taking the ‘rents to the airport on Tuesday morning, flying on a one-day business trip to Pasadena on Wedensday, and getting back into the CPG rehearsal schedule Thursday and Saturday.

Oh, yeah, and hopefully some time with Margie, and a bit of CoH, too. 🙂

Pretty in pink

Katherine at local miniature golf.this post enabled by airblogging.com….

Katherine at local miniature golf.

this post enabled by airblogging.com.

Doyce scoops the New York Times

On golf, no less….

On golf, no less.

Plantings

Had, by the way, a thoroughly enjoyable Sunday with my folks, the centerpiece of which was planting plants in the yard — stuff we’d bought the weekend before at Tagawa…

Had, by the way, a thoroughly enjoyable Sunday with my folks, the centerpiece of which was planting plants in the yard — stuff we’d bought the weekend before at Tagawa (and which needed a few days to acclimate from the hothouse) and stuff we’d picked up from the church flower sale that day.

Yes, my folks drove several hundred miles to do yard work. Go fig.

That wasn’t the actual plan, of course. But they were both sympathetic to Margie and my having had a stressful schedule the week before, plus they have this odd sense that it doesn’t matter what we do when they visit, so long as we do it as a family. The in-laws feel the same way, which makes the Host in me get all confused (“But! But! We could go visit the Mint! Or some wineries! I have an itinerary scheduled out to the half-hour right here! With copies for everyone!”).

So we planted four big roses, a few smaller ones, and numerous ground covers and bits and pieces. Some tomatoes (shudder). The flower boxes got planted with the standard marigolds and snapdragons. Dad and I dug and planted, Mom watered, Margie did the flower boxes, and Katherine buzzed around and helped (netting on the “help” side, rather than the “be in the way” side, which was nice).

Then we ate much steak for dinner, grilled on the new grill.

The one thing we didn’t manage this trip was any golf, alas. I didn’t get anything scheduled while I was in California, and by the time I got to it on Sunday, there wasn’t anything to be had. Our Monday afternoon plans fell through due to various other scheduling conflicts, resolved by simplifying things and Just Going to the Zoo. Which we did.

Sinking it

Doyce mixes the twisted psychological rules setting of Sorcerer with my favorite public recreation and comes up with Eighteen: A Golfing Epic for Sorcerer. Needs some play-testing (hint), but it…

Doyce mixes the twisted psychological rules setting of Sorcerer with my favorite public recreation and comes up with Eighteen: A Golfing Epic for Sorcerer. Needs some play-testing (hint), but it looks to be a very nice extrapolation of the idea that golf isn’t a competition against the course, or others, but against yourself — just what Sorcerer excels at dealing with (usually in a more metaphysical fashion).

Pricey, but fun

So, as previously mentioned, we played yesterday at Lone Tree Golf Club. It was as challenging as advertised, but never of the “Whap ’em over the head with a golf…

So, as previously mentioned, we played yesterday at Lone Tree Golf Club. It was as challenging as advertised, but never of the “Whap ’em over the head with a golf bag and watch ’em bleed” style of course design. Lots of bunkers (Doyce seemed particularly drawn to them), and the rough is well-trimmed but deep. A fair amount of water, both creeks and lakes, and I did lose my share of balls, but nothing nearly as disastrous as some other course I’ve played. Lots of undulating fairways and slopes, but a very reasonable course to play.

But not cheap. Forty bucks for a parks-and-rec district member, sixty for a non-member (carts extra, of course). It’s not that you can’t find more expensive courses to play on, but you can find decent courses for less. But as a special, once-in-a-while, it may be worth it, esp. if we can bump up our game a little bit.

It’s a long course, and I did indeed share a cart with my dad, though I probably ended up walking about two-thirds of it, as he went to one side of the fairway and I to the other. Doyce had a pull-cart, and clocked his mileage; I may go back to that habit (clocking mileage) again.

My game was unspectacular, to either extreme. My driving, particularly at the end of the game (of course) got pretty good; my chipping was awful, and my putting seemed to always be going off to the right (short or long). I ended up with a 118 for the 18, but that’s an honest score (vs. taking double-par on particularly bad holes), and only includes a couple of mulligans. It also includes, therefore, at least one 11. Given the nature of the course, that was pretty respectable for me. And Doyce beat me by just one stroke, so that wasn’t too bad, either. Dad had an awful front 9, but a very competitive back 9. So we all had fun, I think.

Doyce and I have both improved our game, but playing more frequently would probably be the main way we could improve further. That entails certain logistical problems, though, so I don’t know that it’s going to happen any time soon. Though the prospect was raised last night of the Margie and Jackie doing a Best Ball against Doyce and I (individually), which might be fun. If we had any free time …

Whilst we were golfing, the ladyfolk did some swimming, and went and saw Princess Diaries II. Then we gathered back at the house (along with Randy), ate some good grub (but none of the dessert), and then the guys watched The Legend of Bagger Vance (goofy, but a good golf flick), while the ladies watched How To Lose a Guy in Ten Days downstairs.

All in all, a nice day.

Why we keep coming back …

The 4th hole of the South Suburban Par 3 is the longest, requiring all of a 5 wood shooting down from a hill to the green. My first shot was…

The 4th hole of the South Suburban Par 3 is the longest, requiring all of a 5 wood shooting down from a hill to the green. My first shot was wide to the right, in the rough, though still in-bounds.

Second shot? Enh. I pitched it up about three feet short of the green. Dagnabbit.

Doyce, meanwhile, had a tee shot just short of the green, and his chip up was very nice, just three feet from the hole or something like that.

I pulled out my chipper, looked at where Doyce’s ball lay compared to mine, looked at my 25-foot or so shot from off the green, and suggested he mark his ball, to avoid it getting hit. “I mean, I know my ball will go unerringly into the hole, but you might want to mark it anyway, just to be safe.” Fact is, as it was in the vague area of the hole, I had a vague hope that I might land the ball somewhere in that region.

He smiled and marked it.

I chipped the ball up, and it rolled, unerringly, past Doyce’s ball marker (wouldn’t have hit it) and into the hole.

He looked at me and said, “I hate you.”

And that’s why we keep golfing. Because strokes of luck (so to speak) like that happen just often enough.

Round 1

Friday we went golfing late in the day on the South Suburban executive course (a little par 27 short 9). Dad and I and Doyce went first, with Katherine in…

Friday we went golfing late in the day on the South Suburban executive course (a little par 27 short 9). Dad and I and Doyce went first, with Katherine in tow; Margie, Jackie, and Mom followed behind.

I had one of my best games on that 9, ending up with a 37 — including three pars and a couple of birdies. Nothing over a 5, no hole blow-ups. Lost two balls, found two. A lot of luck, but my game was remarkably steady. Huzzah.

The ladies had a fun time, too, especially since some of us guys (I) weren’t there rushing them along or giving them unsolicited advice.

Tommorow the guys go out for 18 at Lone Tree, where I’ve not played before. (The lady-folk are going to find something fun to do.) One review:

The Lone Tree Golf Club offers a challenging championship course designed by Arnold Palmer. Started as a private country club in 1985, the 7,012-yard course opened to the public in 1991 and now surrounds a 45,000-square-foot clubhouse, which includes guest suites, cafe, pro shop and pool, as well as tennis courts and a fitness room. The fairways are wide and forgiving, yet most are rolling and sloped presenting challenging lies with every shot.

“Wide and forgiving” is good …

And here:

The Lone Tree Golf Course is one of the most outstanding golf course values in the Denver Metro Area. Home to numerous Colorado Section PGA events and other state amateur events, Lone Tree is one of the best conditioned courses around. Designed by Arnold Palmer, this well bunkered 7054 yard layout, offers manicured, undulating greens, and spectacular views of Denver and the front range.

It also mentions water hazards on 11 holes. Eep.

Tell me about that “wide and forgiving fairways” thing again?

Here’s a much longer review. Sounds … like we’ll have a challenging time.

Your golf joke for today …

To celebrate their 50th anniversary, a husband booked a round of golf for his wife and himself at the famous Hidden Cypress course at Hilton Head. On the third tee,…

To celebrate their 50th anniversary, a husband booked a round of golf for his wife and himself at the famous Hidden Cypress course at Hilton Head.

On the third tee, the husband hesitated in teeing off and turned slowly to his wife and said, contritely, “Darling, I have to confess something. Twenty years ago I had a brief affair. It meant nothing, but I’ve been wracked with guilt ever since. I hope you can forgive me.”

His wife was hurt, but said, “Dearest, those days are long gone. What we have now is far more valuable. I forgive you.”

They embraced and kissed.

On the seventeenth tee, the husband was starting his back swing when the wife blurted out, “I’m sorry darling, and I’ve been so conscience-stricken since you told me, but, since we’re being honest with each other, I have something to tell you also. Fifty-two years ago I had a sex change operation; I was a man before I met you. I — I hope you can forgive me.”

The husband had frozen at the top of his back swing — and now he threw a fit!

He slammed the driver into the ground, kicked the ball into the woods, stormed off the tee, pushed the golf cart over on its side, broke the rest of his clubs one by one, then started on her.

He screamed and ranted, “You liar! You cheat! You despicable deceiver! How could you?! I trusted you, trusted you with all my heart and soul …

Continue reading “Your golf joke for today …”

Weekend update

Another one of those Lost Weekends, where everything sort of blurs together in a flurry of activity, only ending when you realize, Holy Moley, it’s Monday! Friday Another Margie Gras…

Another one of those Lost Weekends, where everything sort of blurs together in a flurry of activity, only ending when you realize, Holy Moley, it’s Monday!

Friday
Another Margie Gras for the summer, this time focusing on blender drinks (both juice and ice cream based). Tasty, calorie-laden fun, complete with something wonderful called a “Blue Swan” (with local mods). The Testerfolk, Stan, Randy, and Dave & Lori were all there, and we had the normal level of raucusitude, aided by further screenings of Invader Zim.

I was actually exhausted from a long week, and crashed on the rocking chair, missing the second half of the evening. Dave & Lori, and Randy, headed home, with the Testerfolk and Stan crashing (as planned, for a Margie Gras) at our place …

Saturday
Katherine was at her sleepover still (hence the scheduling of Margie Gras), so we were able to have a relatively leisurely Saturday morning. I slept till 10, and came down to find Doyce making Lumpley Pancakes for the group, made with Sharp’s cider. A bit thick (and thus difficult to cook), but yummy.

We then somehow magically transitioned to Margie and Jackie going off for pedi/manicures, while Stan, Doyce, Justin and I went golfing at Centennial Golf Course, a/k/a Littleton Golf Course. (It was formally known as Centennial, but now seems to be renamed Littleton, probably because we now have a city of Centennial and the course is in Littleton. Whatever.)

For not having been out on the course since May or so, I was actually pretty pleased by my game. Only lost three balls, two to water. All parts of my game were firing on at least three of four cylinders, with no persistent flaws. Drives were decently lengthed and straight; chips were pretty much where I wanted; putts weren’t too bad. Ended up with a 49 on the back 9 (which, before I go capering about, I have to remember is actually a par 32), but still only ended up losing net to Doyce by 1 stroke. Woo-hoo.

Headed back home. Margie had picked up an exhausted Katherine (“sleepover” evidently meaning that one early on decides that the time for “sleep” is “over”), but Jackie had taken her while Margie worked on game prep for Sunday. Stan and I picked up Katherine and headed back to our house; Jackie followed a while later, both Justin and Doyce needing their own early sleep times.

Ate very yummy home-made pizza, then watched some Olympics coverage. Mercifully, from what I saw, the previous Olympics framing device (turning the event into a mini-series about four or five pre-judged-noteworthy athletes) has been abandoned, though there’s still a lot more personalization and pumping-up-the-drama (as if the competition needed it) than feels necessary. And while the emphasis was mostly on what the American team — excuse me, “Team USA” — was doing, or at most the teams that they were facing, we did get some other events with non-American winners covered.

By the way, congratulations to Puerto Rico on showing up this year’s “Dream Team” NBA professionals from the US in basketball. Which having been said, why the hell is Puerto Rico fielding its own Olympic team? Last time I checked, that’s a US commonwealth …

Sunday
Off to church, lippety-clippety. I may be becoming the Official Photographer for the parish. Last week, Bonnie had asked me to video-tape her sermon. Okay, fine. Someone saw me doing that, and asked if I could video-tape the guest preacher this week (a missionary who’s usually in Tunisia; she wanted to send it on to his mom in San Diego). And while I was getting the camera set up, someone handed me their little Instamatic and asked if I could take some shots of the baptism during the service …

Not that I mind, to be sure.

Back home again, and we-all (Stan still being with us) had smoothies for breakfast (having a plenitude of ice cream and fruit juice and frozen fruit left from Friday night). Then Margie still needed prep time for the game, so I took Katherine to the swimming pool for an hour. She’s doing great with jumping in from the side (holding her noodle), and I’m glad we have some swimming classes starting up for her at the end of the month (even if it’s, well, coming to the end of swimming season).

I got some sun on my legs golfing on Saturday, to my surprise (it occurs to me that I’ve been golfing in long pants these past several outings, largely to avoid just that). The swimming session added to the overall toasting for the weekend, which was a bit surprising — I’ve been in the pool several times this year without a problem, but this time seemed to have been just what I needed to get lightly crisped. The discomfort from the results of my not sunscreening my bod is more than matched by the discomfort of Margie looking smugly reproving over the same.

Back home, and a long ViD session (running until after 9). But in that time we both pursued some personal action in the caravan, fought an air elemental, the mage who summoned it, and an animated mind-controlling statue. Since Margie was on GM duty, I was more in host/babysitter mode, which was actually fine (and makes me appreciate all the more how Margie does that while I’m GMing).

Quick clean-up and got to bed before ten, which was quite nice, and slept well.

And … well, Holy Moley, it’s Monday. Ah, well.

Golf follow-up

Played on Monday with my dad, and the Testerfolk. Whereas on Friday I was feeling “on my game,” Monday I was feeling a degree or two off-plumb, starting the first…

Played on Monday with my dad, and the Testerfolk. Whereas on Friday I was feeling “on my game,” Monday I was feeling a degree or two off-plumb, starting the first two holes with two lost balls and two pickups-with-double-par. Things got a bit better after that, but there were no good shots, just a lot of not-too-bad ones. (And, for completists, that was a 47-with-an-asterisk on a Par 27. Eep.)

Gotta get out on the course (and driving range) more.

Links

First golf outing of the season — Margie and me, Mom & Dad, off at the South Suburban Par 3. Oh, and Katherine, who tagged along. A few noteworthy items:…

First golf outing of the season — Margie and me, Mom & Dad, off at the South Suburban Par 3. Oh, and Katherine, who tagged along. A few noteworthy items:

I was hitting actually very good, seeming to have forgotten more bad habits than good habits. I was shooting generally straight and well-lofted. Huzzah.
My putting sucked. This was due to the mirror-like nature of the greens where, if you didn’t hit the hole, you were guaranteed to go another 3-4 ft., minimum.
Margie had some good shots, and I’d like to see her get some more lessons in this summer.
Katherine did okay. She had her little set of clubs with her, but didn’t do much with them after we started playing (probably because I was being the Type A Impatient Golfer sort). But for not having ever been on the course before, she was usually quiet when she needed to be, didn’t get much in the way, and seemed to have a good time.
Net loss, 1 ball (lost two, found one). That’s pretty damned good for me. Heck, I got up to the green in one on the infamous ball-sucking 9th, which was the first time for that, I think.

More golf on Monday with the Testerfolk. Stay tuned.

It’s that time of year again

Looking forward to it. Really….

Looking forward to it. Really.

Golf balls and chili bowls

Two taste treats that taste great together … Or, maybe not. Saturday morning and afternoon was taken up with the parish golf tourney at Deer Creek, a very attractive but…

Two taste treats that taste great together …

Or, maybe not.

Saturday morning and afternoon was taken up with the parish golf tourney at Deer Creek, a very attractive but deucedly difficult course in the southwest metro area (right where C470 swings around at the foothills, between Bowles and Kipling). We had thirteen foursomes, which was pretty decent, plus an array of other competitions, sponsorships, etc., which netted $2500 or so for the outreach programs.

I would have netted about that many strokes around 18, were we not playing a best ball scramble, so that we used the best shot as the next place to hit from for each in the foursome. I was pleased that we used four or five of mine over the course of the day (always when the one powerhouse in our foursome had a problem). My driving was so-so, my chipping was good, my putting usually short. I actually didn’t play too badly, all told, and the foursome ended up at one under par.

From which I derive one of Hill’s Laws of Golf:

It’s easier to make a good shot when you start from a good position.

Which is an advantage of a best ball format, because you nearly always end up in a good lie, which means your next shot is more likely to be a good one. Seeing as how I’m someone who tends to tack his way across the fairway to the green, that’s nothing to sneeze at.

Our foursome also burned through twenty (purchased) mulligans to make that score, so take it for what it’s worth. I also lost at least a dozen balls, and wasn’t the only one. If the course ever sinks into the ground with nary a trace behind, it will be due to the weight of the golf balls left behind. A lot of ravines, grasses, and environmentally sensitive wetlands, making for narrow fairways and links-style holes. Eep.

Still, much fun.

That was followed by the parish chili competition and dinner. We probably had about 120 people all told, and 17 competitors. Somehow I got drafted as MC, initially just running and watching over the karaoke machine, but eventually as spokesvoice for the whole shindig.

The karaoke machine was a bust. We borrowed one from a parishioner, and I made sure it worked okay and understood the mechanism at home.

Heh.

I didn’t count on the AV equipment at church not having video-audio-audio jacks to use. Old TV, old VCR, and thus a trip to Radio Shack to get something that would convert the out signal from the karaoke machine to a coax to plug into the TV.

And even then, I discovered that the less-than-stellar array of disks that came with the machine (which included all of three songs I knew) all had different interfaces on their menus, different ways of shutting off the accompaniment singing, etc.

And even then, we discovered, the speaker on the TV was good for about two tables-lengths of ambient noise.

So after some faltering karaoke starts and lots of people looking at me making pointing motions to their ears, we abandoned that bit of entertainment (superfluous anyway) and just enjoyed chili, with occasional announcements bellowed out by me in my usual delicate fashion.

In addition to a competition chili, Margie made Mundane Chili for the Masses (so to speak), in Beef, Turkey, and Veggie configuration, so that folks would have something to eat, versus tasting the competition stuff.

Margie, I am tickled to note, won first prize with her competition chili from the “celebrity judges.” I confess I didn’t vote for her (which she needled me about to no end) because (a) I thought it was too spicy (a lot spicier than her usual fine fare), and (b) I’m a sucker for green chili, and she fixed a red one.

But I was happy my MCing duties included giving her a prize. She deserved it.

And we raised another $1000 or so for outreach programs, between entry fees and donations at the door and raffles. And people got to each a lot of chili (and joke about how we should probably break out the incense for services the next morning). Again, a good deal of fun all around.

Weekend Update

Aside from the Gaming Event on Saturday, it was a pretty hectic weekend nonetheless. I’d been planning on Friday night being my “bachelor night,” as Margie would be off at…

Aside from the Gaming Event on Saturday, it was a pretty hectic weekend nonetheless.

I’d been planning on Friday night being my “bachelor night,” as Margie would be off at the D&D game, and, once Kitten was asleep, I could focus on game prep. So I was more or less aghast when Doyce mentioned that the D&D game had been cancelled for the evening.

Well, Margie went over to the Testerfolks anyway, as did Randy, and the four of them did their part of the game prep for Saturday (e.g., checking skills to make sure there were no serious gaps) and doubtless told Nervous GM jokes.

As it was, though, I was able to finish up the prep I wanted to do, and really was ready to rock on Saturday. Even moved the game start time up a couple of hours, which worked just fine, as it turned out.

Sunday we had been planning on golfing, Doyce and Jackie and Margie and I. The ladyfolk have been taking intro lessons. So, a quick 9 holes of Par 3 at South Suburban sounded like it would be fun.

Well, it would have been more fun if I’d used my head about our tee time and made it around 1 p.m., rather than Noon. Somewhere with church and brunch, we lost track of time.

So there I am, calling up the sitter to find out if she can come a little early (11:30 rather than 11:45), and I’m glancing at the clock as I do so, and talking, and realize in midsentence that it’s actually 11:50 already. Eep!

A flurry of clothes changing and the like, and the timely (if late) arrival of the sitter, sent us roaring off the course, where we discovered …

… we’d missed our tee time.

But the starter promised to fit us in.

If there was a cancellation. Sh’yeah, right, on a pleasant Sunday afternoon, with all the starting times filled up until the evening.

A couple of buckets of balls, and a cool soda, later — we got called. Huzzah.

For the record, the ladies did pretty well. Indeed, Margie started off by shooting par on the first hole, winning it — and Jackie shot a bogie, beating Doyce. I was beginning to think we’d been snookered.

Things went a bit more predictably after that. I shot 4s all the way until 7, when my game fell apart.

All in all, an enjoyable interlude. We’ll have to do it again, soon.

Apres golf, we went to our house and grilled up some burgers and played Munchkin Fu. A good time was had.

Getting my money’s worth

Went out golfing for the first time this season, the excuse being that my Dad was in town. I shot 45 on the front nine, 54 on the back nine…

Went out golfing for the first time this season, the excuse being that my Dad was in town.

I shot 45 on the front nine, 54 on the back nine — and Centennial is a Par 63 course. Bleah.

It did confirm to me that, damn, I need to get out more often. I couldn’t hit a long driver straight to save my life, and my pitching game tended to go from one side of the green to the other. I, personally, am supporting the golf ball industry in this nation, or at least the folks who sell in bulk to Costco.

I discovered, as I was getting my clubs back into shape, that I seem to have lost my pitching wedge and sand wedge; I suspect they ended up as a final sacrifice to the Golf Gods of Pelican Hills, abandoned on the side of the 18th geen as I desperately tried to finish the round. Ouch. Both were legacy clubs from my grandfather, including the Ping pitching wedge.

Anyway, I ran out Sunday afternoon to a local golf shop that does a lot of used club sales. I picked up a Fuzzy Zoeller pitching wedge and a massively heavy no-name sand wedge for $12. I also picked up a 6-iron for Doyce, who had been pining for one for some time; since it was missing a label, it was free, hot damn.

Let’s just say that Doyce was a lot happier with the 6 than I was with the P. Not that it’s the club’s fault (in my case), just bad play.

My putting and my short fairway woods were pretty good, though.

Got to play more …

Golf

An odd confluence … Monday night, I met with some other folks from my church to help organize a golf tournament. Last night, I signed up Margie for golf lessons…

An odd confluence …

Monday night, I met with some other folks from my church to help organize a golf tournament.

Last night, I signed up Margie for golf lessons with the local parks & rec district.

Today, Doyce reminded me that, if my folks are coming out over Memorial Day, we should probably schedule some warm-up golf before then.

These sorts of things all happening in a cluster is par for the course with me.

Hoity, and also toity

The last day of my work trip to SoCal was a golf match (picked up very politely by one of our vendors, who in turn got to ride around with…

The last day of my work trip to SoCal was a golf match (picked up very politely by one of our vendors, who in turn got to ride around with us and discuss business) at the rather fabulous Pelican Hill Golf Course. Located in Newport Coast (which immediately tells SoCalians that it’s going to be tres pricey), it’s a gorgeous course to play on, some holes down overlooking the beach, many with ocean vistas.

Immaculate grounds (though it’s a bit annoying that Friday morning is when all the groundskeepers are out trimming the trees and mowing the rough) and a lovely club house. Very, very nice.

Complementary valet parking, not to mention valeting of your clubs down to the carts. There was a very tasty breakfast snack stand (hot food from the restaurant, lots of muffins and the like) down by the carts, too.

Oh, yeah, the carts. Little coolers with bottled water. GPS systems that tell you how far you are from green center (and other landmarks, like those traps, or the edge of the plateau). Very, very nice.

And when youg get back from the round, your clubs are grabbed to be cleaned and taken back up to the parking lot, and you are handed scented, cold, wet towels to wipe off your hot, sweaty neck and face and hands.

Nice.

Of course, green fees are outrageous. I don’t play places that cost more than I shoot, at least not regularly. It’s not someplace I’d go to on my own; I’m not sure I got five times as nice an experience as when I golf at my local muni course (even though I struggled mightily to get as many strokes out of the game as possible).

Final score: 125 strokes (!), about 15 balls lost (!!), and a good time.

And, boy, am I glad to be home.