Katherine can eat at the table. She can eat at a restaurant, scooping salsa on a chip or eating rice and beans with a fork. And when she peels a…
Katherine can eat at the table. She can eat at a restaurant, scooping salsa on a chip or eating rice and beans with a fork. And when she peels a banana, she throws the peel away in the trash can.
And she can pull on her own socks (and, sometimes, shoes). And pull them off.
And when she’s put down for a nap and is up in her room alone and strips herself naked, she can put her clothes in the hamper and her diaper in the Diaper Genie.
What a clever girl.
All we needed was diaper cream. Our Safeway was out of the kind we like, or they had reorganized it someplace we couldn’t find, or something. So we went by…
All we needed was diaper cream. Our Safeway was out of the kind we like, or they had reorganized it someplace we couldn’t find, or something. So we went by Toys ‘R’ Us. With Katherine.
And exited with …
Expensive diaper cream.
On the bright side, walking out, we saw an incredibly beautiful sunset sky. Pale blues that faded into pale greens next to vivid peach tones so luminous it made me hungry for desert.
I love living here.
Another study is out claiming a link between violence on TV and aggressive behavior. I’d really like to read the original, because what I’m seeing in the article is not…
Another study is out claiming a link between violence on TV and aggressive behavior. I’d really like to read the original, because what I’m seeing in the article is not terribly convincing.
As one person commenting on the study points out, assuming there really is a connection in the numbers portrayed, it’s at least as plausible that families which produce violent children also let their kids watch TV a lot.
I guess I resist this stuff on two levels, possibly interrelated. First, aside from the Forbidden Fruit of the Three Stooges, my parents did not place many particular restrictions on my TV viewing. From unexpurgated Road Runner cartoons to regular shoot-em-ups and beat-em-ups on Mannix and The FBI, I watched it all. And, aside from the occasional impulse to have the US bomb the snot out of somebody, I don’t consider myself a violent person. So my own, personal, anecdotal evidence seems to deny the conclusion that is drawn.
And that leads into the second point. What tends to happen with studies like this is aesthetically abhorrent and usually not even in keeping with the conclusions. Various folks get their knickers in a twist about violence on TV, and the next thing you know, you get bowdlerized Bugs Bunny cartoons and abortions like The A-Team (where it’s okay to shoot as much as you want, but heaven forfend anyone actually get hit by a stray round).
Indeed, sometimes this very impulse is fed into by misleading questions in the studies. What does this study consider to be an act of aggression, or violence, either on TV or in personal life? Does that pass the reasonability test, before we start pulling out the metaphorical torches and pitchforks to burn down the castle of Evil Dr. Hollywood?
Look at the comment of the gent dissenting in this article. “”Some studies have shown that about 75 per cent of kids’ TV viewing is done without the company of parents, which is tragic.” That, folks, is a much more significant problem, both in terms of the lessons that kids might take away from TV, in terms of what they might be watching, and in terms of what else it might say about how the kids are being raised.
(By the way, this is one of the areas where Margie and I differ. She’s much more sensitive to violence on TV. But we both agree that supervised TV watching is important, which, to my mind, is the more critical thing here.)
(Via Doyce)
A Lesson from the Book of Dad I. If you would allow your child to freely range through the house, leave not a plate of little Dove chocolates on the…
A Lesson from the Book of Dad
I. If you would allow your child to freely range through the house, leave not a plate of little Dove chocolates on the living room coffee table.
II. If you have taken all the Dove chocolates away from your little one, it is likely, even certain, that the tot has hidden one from your view, and, yea, verily, will recover it, open it, and start spreading chocolate hither and thither once your back is once again turned.
III. Difficult it is, nay, impossible, to climb up onto a pink upholstered chair in the living room without placing one’s chocolate-smeared hands upon it in the process. At least if you are under 3 ft. tall.
Thus Endeth the Lesson.
Well, the hardware engineering types came by last week and tested my old notebook and said that the motherboard (and, more specifically, the hard drive controller) was A-OK. So I’m…
Well, the hardware engineering types came by last week and tested my old notebook and said that the motherboard (and, more specifically, the hard drive controller) was A-OK. So I’m getting a replacement hard drive toward the end of the week, and I get to move out of the Holiday Inn and back into my New (But Empty) Home, to be followed by the requisite wallpapering and recarpeting … again.
*Sigh*
A moderately busy week ahead. Trying desperately to get back on top of things at work, since I basically lost half of last week. Lectoring at church tonight for Margie and me. Friday’s off, at least for me, and then a busy Easter weekend.
On the to-do list (at least the to-do list worth quoting here) are an upgrade here to MT 2.0, and all the coolness thereof, and getting some work done on my game in a couple of weeks (7 April). Oh, and getting my personal stuff back onto my Not-New, Improved, Hopefully-Not-Crashing-Again Notebook.
One minor change at the same time is a self-imposed restriction on the breakfast room table. I’ve been essentially using it as a desk for the past several months, WLANning over to Margie’s computer for my Internet connection. I’ll still be doing that, but I have to be sure to clean it up for meals, since we are now (miracle of miracles) eating at the table, since Katherine is eating at the table, rather than in the high chair. Good stuff, good development, good habit, but it will make the home computing thing a bit more complex.
I went for a walk this morning around the block with Katherine. We heard and pointed out birds, including Bob the Raven. We found some sidewalk chalk. We spotted the…
I went for a walk this morning around the block with Katherine. We heard and pointed out birds, including Bob the Raven. We found some sidewalk chalk. We spotted the kitty, and several doggies.
We had fun.
Long day of meetings today, starting with a 7 a.m. phonecon. Not that I needed to get up for breakfast, after the massive, late dinner we’d eaten. By the end…
Long day of meetings today, starting with a 7 a.m. phonecon. Not that I needed to get up for breakfast, after the massive, late dinner we’d eaten.
By the end of the day, I was seriously dragging. In fact, I was getting pretty … well, depressed. Seeing my part of the department being split up, realizing how poorly I was managing things, thinking that the contributions I’d been making were not only unappreciated, but justifiably so.
Well, we broke up around 4:30, I headed back to the hotel, called Margie, and she suggested I take a Power Nap, since we were meeting for dinner around 6:15. I did so, and actually woke up quite a bit more refreshed and renewed. Yay me.
We went to dinner at Universal City Walk, which is actually just across the street from the hotel and office. The actual restaurant we went to was Emeril’s, part of the small franchise he runs. Now, say what you will about the man, I thought the food was superb (I had a marvelous veal chop, and to-die-for home made vanilla ice cream), the wine list extensive (more Silver Oak, though we didn’t order any), and the service excellent (better than Charley’s, though it’s service was pretty good). The cost was comparable to the night before — yet another “CER Dinner” — but I picked up the tab (i.e., I have even more reason to do an expense report on Monday …).
(Some of the party adjourned to the cigar lounge upstairs. I paid the tab — and then we got another $10 charge, and then as I was paying that, the waiter told me they were still ordering drinks and cigars upstairs. We cut them off … 🙂 )
Then a quick stop by the Universal Studios Store to pick up some Gifts for the loved ones at home (since I may have very limited time on Sunday morning), and back to the hotel.
Talked with Margie some more. Katherine can now say, “I’m tired.” I miss her. And Margie. Margie is still raving over the huge bouquet of tulips I had delivered on Wednesday. I never used to be a “send flowers” person, but it is a gift that has its moments, and I’m glad their beauty and presence help her cope with playing Single Mom while I’m gone.
Have to do some more Work Work tonight before I go to bed (earlier tonight!), but I wanted to get that all written down before I have at it.
Went for a walk with Katherine this afternoon, since she’s been suffering from cabin fever. It was a true joy to see her excitement. Her curiosity over what she saw….
Went for a walk with Katherine this afternoon, since she’s been suffering from cabin fever.
It was a true joy to see her excitement. Her curiosity over what she saw. A crocus! I must pick it! What’s that?! I must run to it!
There was a boxer running loose in the neighborhood. I’ve seen him before (usually with his owner running after him). Nice animal, kind of skittish. Ordinarily I’d make friendly noises to him, maybe even try to get close enough to read his collar for a phone number. Instead … all I could think of is how few boxer-sized meals Katherine would make.
Doggie!
Not now, dear. Let’s look at those crocuses again.
Katherine’s primary title remains Little Miss Entropy (maximizing disorder wherever she goes), but she’s also gaining personal renown as the Piping Voice of My Conscience. To wit, sitting here, working…
Katherine’s primary title remains Little Miss Entropy (maximizing disorder wherever she goes), but she’s also gaining personal renown as the Piping Voice of My Conscience.
To wit, sitting here, working from home, I would normally be inclined to be nibbling on stuff. Chips (many, many potato chips around here). Cookies (thank you, Girl Scouts everywhere). Any other number of things.
But I can’t. Because Katherine will want some. And I’m trying to minimize her inter-meal snacking, which means I end up minimizing my own.
Which, yeah, is a Good Thing. But it’s still mildly irksome.
Over the Holidays I mentioned how visiting the relatives in California was like going off to Faerie, a timeless place of good food and revelry, in which normal life seems…
Over the Holidays I mentioned how visiting the relatives in California was like going off to Faerie, a timeless place of good food and revelry, in which normal life seems suspended until, poof, you wake up in the Catskill Mountains with a long white beard.
Well, having the relatives visit here is much the same. In this case, Margie’s folks, a pair of wonderful people. And nothing is the same when they’re here.
Little to no TV. Little to no time on the computer. Meals out, or different sorts of meals in. Katherine largely taken care of, but a whirlwind of projects.
So, as Margie drives them back to the airport, I’m sort of blinking and trying to figure out what I’ve let lapse for the past several days, and remember what things got put away in a welter of rearrangement and tidying and which might never be seen again for weeks or months or years.
Speaking of things not see for years, the big project this time out turned out to be our basement. We moved into this house in January 1996, just over six years ago. In that time, the basement has served as The Place Where Things Go. It’s been overflow pantry and a place where things are stored and retrieved and stored again. But it’s also been a place where things go, Never To Be Seen Again. And, of course, over time it’s grown progressively more difficult to navigate in.
This was exacerbated last fall when we had a sewer backup, which required the removal of everything from the furnace room. Some of that everything ended up getting thrown away (or will be, once our insurance claim is processed), but for the most part it meant pushing the saturation point of the other rooms to the supersaturation point, where odd things started precipitating around the edges.
Well a few months back, Jackie and Doyce helped us get started cleaning and reorganizing. The last four days of activity as Casa de Hill und Kleerup, though, actually finished the job.
We have a basement! Really! No, really!
The trash man is going to plotz when he swings by Thursday morning, but, damn, we have a basement. We could sleep people down there. I can run games down there. I can get back to working on my ever-growing comic book collection.
And we can find stuff! Stuff we’d forgotten we had! Stuff we remembered we had, but had consigned to the maw of the Dark Basement Gods.
Yee-haw!
Oh, yeah — Katherine graduated to a “big girl’s bed,” a bunk bed we put together for her, relegating the crib to the (heh) basement. But now there’s a place for stuff like that.
Oh, yeah. Yee-haw!
Tomorrow it’s back to work, a few frenzied days before the weekend, catching up on blogging as well as my Real Job. Then over the weekend — well, likely things will be dark here, as I’ll be up in the mountains on a retreat, and when I get back Sunday I immediately hop on a plane (United Airlines Mechanics Willing) and fly off to Oak Ridge, Tenn., arriving there Late, Late, Late.
So if you visit here, and don’t see anything new … well, I haven’t died, and I won’t be off in Faerie again until June, but I’ll be in and out for the next week-n-change.
Woo-hoo! These weren’t due until the end of next week, but since Kara (of Sanity Denied) and I exchanged questions (and answers) so soon, I might as well post these….
Woo-hoo! These weren’t due until the end of next week, but since Kara (of Sanity Denied) and I exchanged questions (and answers) so soon, I might as well post these. Besides, Blogger Insider took a break last fortnight.
Here are Kara’s questions and my answers. Hit her site for the reverse.
1. I went back and read your archives. I was really enthralled by the way you seemed to post and update exactly how you felt at each moment durind the terror of 9/11. I think a lot of people’s blogs from that day stand as an incredible monument to their feelings and the powerful emotions of that day. Do you ever reread that section of your archives, and if you do, what are your feelings?
I’ve been intentionally not going back and rereading things until I get to some major anniversaries. The 24th of this month, for example, is six months since I began blogging, and I’ll probably do something then. And when we get around to 11 March, I’ll probably go back and reread them.
Well, that’s not 100% true. I had cause to go back and take a quick look, and it was interesting watching my emotions bob up and down that day, and the few days following — lots of anger, but also lots of trying to intellectualize the whole thing.
All I know is that I’m glad I have the blog, because, frankly, I don’t remember much of those couple of days.
2. How is your New Year’s resolution coming along?
Heh. Well, my pants have been feeling a little loose. I’ll know tomorrow, because a few days after New Years I was in at the doctors and was Officially Weighted at 248 … and I’m going in tomorrow and we’ll see what they say.
I was just noticing that, in trying to keep Katherine from ruining her appetite for dinner, and so not giving in to her desire for snacks, I’m also perforce not snacking, which is probably a Good Thing. Scratch that — I know it’s a Good Thing.
3. What is the most unexpected or suprising experience you have had as a
parent?
As a global thing, just the incredible time sink it’s been. I look back on those feckless days of, “Sigh, here we are in the afternoon on a weekend with just nothing to do. Let’s hop in the car and drive someplace,” and marvel.
As a specific thing, it was probably the first time Katherine climbed out of her crib (during an afternoon nap), toddled downstairs, past where I was sitting at the breakfast table (within eyeshot, if I’d turned my head), went out to the living room, got a knick-knack, and walked back to me and … I finally spotted her. “Gah!” (That was me, not Katherine.)
4. What was your first meeting with Margie like? There has to be a good
story behind all that love!
Actually, Margie and I met in college, introduced by a friend of ours who was running a D&D game and invited us both to it. We were friends then, good friends, and stayed in touch through the various intervening years (and a marriage on my part, where Margie was one of the bridesmaids, as she was also a friend with my now-ex).
So I don’t remember much of that first meeting. Certainly it was not memorable in terms of anything interesting happening, but it was memorable in that we met playing That Evil Demonic Game (which, in fact, is where I’ve met probably 90% of my friends).
Now, asking her out for our first date … there’s an interesting story. But that’s not what you asked. 🙂
5.Tell me more about NaNoWriMo, and how you conquered it.
National Novel Writing Month, a/k/a “Take November, Wad It Up Into A Little Ball, And Throw Any Non-Writing Activities You Had Planned Then Into The Trash.” I conquered it by (a) being someone who writes a lot as part of his job, (b) deciding I would do something fun, not profound, (c) deciding I would not go back and revise lest I never get past the first chapter, and (d) having a wonderful wife who let me sequester myself upstairs for a couple of all-day catch-up fests. Having a friend who was also doing it helped, too, since that made it a bit of a competition.
6. Name your top five places to visit on the web (not weblogs).
In terms of frequency of visits? Amazon, Google … er, SpamCop … um, RefDesk, … damn, I really don’t go that many other places these days, besides blogs. The Rocky Mountain News, the Christian Science Monitor, Yahoo News, and the Wall Street Journal as news fodder for my blog.
7. Do people “in real life” know about your weblog, for instance, people
from work or extended family members? Have they ever reacted negatively to
anything you’ve blogged about? If so, how did you deal with it?
My folks know about it, and read it — my mom does, at least. I’ve mentioned it to my in-laws, but they’re not much into Web stuff. Most of my local friends know about it. I don’t know that anyone at work knows — but I assume that they can find it, so I’m always very discreet about work-related stuff (especially anything involving managing or HR or stuff like that).
So far I’ve not had any negative reactions from anyone from those arenas — but I endeavor at all time to be inoffensive, so …
8. Do you consider yourself an “artist” or a “scientist”?
Tough one. I’d probably say artist, if pressed — but I try to apply logic and reason to the things I do, esp. at work, as well as creativity.
9. Favorite book?
Urg. I hate this question, if only because I read voraciously, and I only tend to read what I enjoy (reading is entertainment for me, not education). So I’m drawing a blank here. I can tell you what I’m presently reading, which is Which Lie Did I Tell? by William Goldman, one of his books detailing his career as a screenwriter. Vastly entertaining and an interesting introduction to the screenwriting trade.
10. The answer is… 16. What is the question?
“When did you learn to drive?” “What’s four squared?” “What base is hexidecimal?” “How many comic books are in the bag you just picked up from the comic book store?” And we’ll leave it at that.
There is something particularly heartwarming about Katherine’s smile. When she smiles, she smiles whole-heartedly, unreservedly and with complete focus conveying her enjoyment, her glee, her happiness over whatever it is….
There is something particularly heartwarming about Katherine’s smile. When she smiles, she smiles whole-heartedly, unreservedly and with complete focus conveying her enjoyment, her glee, her happiness over whatever it is. (“Katherine — want a strawberry?”)
That she can do that to me, when I am more-than-occasionally Cranky Dad (“Katherine, no! Katherine, put that down! Katherine, get away from there! Katherine, look what you’ve done!”) makes me feel good, too.
The American Academy of Pediatrics has endorsed gay couples being allowed to adopt children. The policy focuses on gay partners where one member is already the legal guardian of children,…
The American Academy of Pediatrics has endorsed gay couples being allowed to adopt children. The policy focuses on gay partners where one member is already the legal guardian of children, but could be extended to gay partners adopting children together.
The AAP cites a large body of research showing no negative outcomes from such families, and notes quite a number of advantages to children in allowing such adoption. These include the ability to get insurance coverage from either partner, the ability of either partner to authorize medical care, and the added family stability that such arrangements would encourage.
“Denying legal parent status through adoption … prevents these children from enjoying the psychologic and legal security that comes from having two willing, capable and loving parents,” the policy says.
Similar positions are held by the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry and the American Psychological Association.
Frankly, it’s about time. Only half the states allow such adoptions at present, while other states, such as Florida, ban any adoption by gays.
While, ideally, there might be some sort of undefined benefit from kids (of either gender) having role models of both genders, huge numbers of families are far from ideal in a variety of ways, yet nobody seriously proposes taking kids out of such settings except in the most extreme situations. Single parent families, families with hostile relationships within them, families where the parents are never around — those fall short of the ideal, too. But they’re all perfectly legal.
If a gay or lesbian couple is committed to each other and the non-parental partner wants to be included in guardianship of the kids involved, more power to him or her for wanting to step up to that responsibility.
(Of course, I also think gay marriage should be legal, so you can write me off as a cockeyed liberal commie heathen or something.)
Doyce conveys some rules about rules. I hope I can bear these things in mind with Katherine. Justin is darned lucky, and will, I suspect, realize it … in another…
Doyce conveys some rules about rules. I hope I can bear these things in mind with Katherine.
Justin is darned lucky, and will, I suspect, realize it … in another twenty years or so.
Quoth Dave, “Crap! Crap!” Inquires Margie, “What is it?” Sullenly replies Dave, “I’m late getting in this month’s comic book order.” Quoth Katherine, “C’ap! C’ap!”…
Quoth Dave, “Crap! Crap!”
Inquires Margie, “What is it?”
Sullenly replies Dave, “I’m late getting in this month’s comic book order.”
Quoth Katherine, “C’ap! C’ap!”
Cold, snowy day here in Denver. A few inches, at least, up here by my office in Golden, quite a bit less down by the house. Driving in was a…
Cold, snowy day here in Denver. A few inches, at least, up here by my office in Golden, quite a bit less down by the house. Driving in was a moderate pain, but I took my time and got here with only a few Hail Marys.
I’m feeling better today, by the by. Certainly well enough to be in the office. We got to bed before 9 last night, which sounds great except that Kitten had a stomach-ache starting around 2 a.m., which led to Margie sitting in there with her for over an hour, and continued intermittent wailing and gnashing of little teeth when she left.
I took a peek in at her this a.m., before I left, just to make sure she had her covers on. She was sleeping on the floor by the door, which I didn’t determine until I had awakened her. More wailing and gnashing ensued, as I tried, unsuccessfully, to quiet her down.
Poor Kitten. Poor Margie.
Well, this week, the answer is obvious: Prep for the big Twelfth Night soiree we’re having Saturday night. Prep for the big super-heroes game I’m inaugurating Sunday. Take care of…
Well, this week, the answer is obvious:
Not necessarily in that order, of course.
Next week? Ah, there’s the rub. Some outstanding projects:
Not, I suspect again, necessarily in that order.
My life … it’s a job with lifetime security.
When does a parent care least about the nature of a toddler’s gastro-intestinal output? When her output all night has been in the opposite direction. *Sigh*. And *Yawn*. Doctor’s appointment…
When does a parent care least about the nature of a toddler’s gastro-intestinal output?
When her output all night has been in the opposite direction.
*Sigh*. And *Yawn*.
Doctor’s appointment later this morning. Don’t expect to get much work done, one way or another.
UPDATE: Went to the clinic. There’s been a particularly nasty bug like this going on with kids, 3-5 day incubation (which just about matches the time she spent in the nursery with kids on Sunday morning and Monday evening). Mercifully, adults seem to be avoid it, which is good, since 3-5 days from now is the Party and the Game (as if we’d want it even if that wasn’t the case).
So, Pedialyte popsicles it is. And a nap for her right now, and early bed times for both of us tonight.
James Lileks has a 17-month-old. The developmental differences with Katherine are minimal enough to be highly, ah, amusing. Gnat has begun to wake a little earlier than usual, by which…
James Lileks has a 17-month-old. The developmental differences with Katherine are minimal enough to be highly, ah, amusing.
Gnat has begun to wake a little earlier than usual, by which I mean she is standing in crib wide staring awake calling out our names at FOUR O’CLOCK in the bloody morning. This simply cannot be encouraged, but there is no reasoning with a 17 month old; you can’t explain that it is the dead of the night, and we cannot go downstairs because there are no good cartoons on, and Mommy and Daddy must sleep because they are already convincing simulacra of the zombies from Night of the Living Dead, and nothing is more injurious your career than thrusting your arms through the door of the meeting room and moaning BRAINS, BRAINS. (It raises people’s expectations that you have some, and then there’s the unspoken expectation that you’ve brought enough for everyone to share.) So we let her go, and eventually she stops. This morning she tried a new tack: DADDY! DADDY! It was like being pierced in the heart for an hour straight, and it guaranteed fitful guilty sleep.
Yeah. Sing it, brother.
Ran across what struck me as a rather bizarre statistic on the radio this morning. It was a little self-serving, since the story was about “luxury” housing for college students,…
Ran across what struck me as a rather bizarre statistic on the radio this morning. It was a little self-serving, since the story was about “luxury” housing for college students, and the person giving the statistic was a developer. Nonetheless, his claim was that, of high school graduates going on to college, 87% had never shared a bedroom, and 82% never shared a bathroom, in their lives.
Never shared a bedroom? Never shared a bathroom? Was there a huge surge in only children that year? Or just a lot of wealthy parents with big houses?
My family was moderately well-to-do while I was growing. My dad had a decent executive position in a major bank. My brother and I shared one bedroom until I was in junior high, when I managed to wheedle my folks into letting me semi-move into the guest room (“semi” because it was expected that I’d move right back into one of the twin beds whenever guests came over). Regardless, we shared a bathroom.
Margie and her brother Eric shared rooms when they were both small. Even later, they still shared bathrooms.
I’ll try not to sound like the old fogie describing how Things Were Tougher But Better Back In My Days, Dammit! But I think kids sharing a room (as well as a bathroom) is a useful thing, not only as a general economy for the family, but as a way to get to learn to share things. Sure, it probably provokes more conflicts, but ultimately I think it also fosters an expectation of sucking it up and dealing with such conflicts.
Weird. Just struck me as weird.