You are going to burn in HELL! (probably)
Oh well.
Christians! – Have you ever wondered if you will make it into heaven?
Well now you can find out with this simple multi-denominational questionnaire. Not only can you find out whether you will make it into heaven, but you will also learn how close to the Lord you will be seated. You can even print out your ticket for presentation to St. Peter when you pass from this life, thus simplifying paperwork!
Oh well — I might as well start sleeping in on Sunday mornings, then.
No ticket allocated – I’m going to hell. I figure it’s because there is cancer in my family and I shoplifted when I was 4. Eh, I guess I’ll have good company.
Going to hell – No ticket required.
See you there!